Cousins

Now - for those of you who know Israel, he is a little spit fire. Just let me tell you. I could do a daily blog on this little guy and you would never get bored. But he has a heart of gold. He LOVES babies. Cheyenne will mention every once in a while that she would like to have a baby sister to play with. (TRY TO EXPLAIN THAT ONE TO HER!!!) Well, right now they have a 6 month old and 4 day old to play with. That should keep her busy for a while! Here is a picture of Chey & Izzy with Andrew when he was born.

I kind of thought with Olivia being the only other girl in the family, Chey would be really tickled over her. We have talked about how she can show Olivia how to play dolls and dress up, etc. No - Chey could care less. Give her Uncle Scott and she is a happy camper. Izzy however, has fallen in love. He can't keep his hands off of "Baby Bolivia". Here are some pics of them.

New Additions

Since the addition of our kids, there have been two more births in our family. We had a new nephew from my older brother Jeff and his wife Nancee. Andrew Silas was born on January 2, 2008. He joined his big grother Glenn Thomas. Nancee had a great pregnancy and had a c-section planned for January 18th - my dad's birthday. (Glenn was delivered on her dad's birthday!) However, little Andrew had other plans all together! Nancee actually went into labor on her own and had to be rushed to the hospital. Andrew was born by stat c-section. She had only been in the hospital for 20 minutes or so when he was actually delivered. It was a scary time, but mom and baby were great. Here is a pic of Andrew when he was born with big brother Glenn holding him.

And just this week we have had another addition. My other brother Scott re-married last July in Jamiaca. It was a beautiful wedding that I was fortunate to be there for. I have a nephew by this brother (from a previous marriage) that is now 15 years old. He welcomed a sister this week! On July 7 at 12:58 a.m. Olivia Blake was born. Now as much as Nancee had the normal pregnance, poor Amy did not. She was sick the entire pregnance. She had a horrible delivery. She pushed for 3 + hours and then wound up with a c-section. The baby had to stay in intermediate care nursery for a few days and only got to stay in the room with Scott & Amy the day before they came home. Here is a picture of Miss Olivia.

Foster Kids

John and I cared for a total of 6 foster children.
The first child we had was a 10 day old baby. In August 2004, we got the phone call that the baby's mom abandoned him at the hospital. The foster mother that had him, had her hands full and could not keep him. This was going to be a long term commitment. Probably a dead ringer for adoption. They couldn't find the father and mom was no where to be found. We were estactic. We had everything ready and picked him up on a Friday afternoon. I left work early and my mom went with me. We had him for 10 days. Long story short - dad was found. He was adamant that the baby was his and he wanted visitation. We scheduled one visit - dad didn't show. The next visit, dad didn't show. Finally it was determined that dad was for real. DFCS had no choice but to give the baby back to his father. The father didn't even know that the baby had been born. We took him to DFCS to leave him with his dad. We were devastated. The church had given us a shower because this was going to be a long term commitment. We were so happy. I had to stay out of work for 1 week, and other members of my family was going to take off to take care of him until he was old enough to go to a daycare. He was loved by so many people in such a short amount of time. We left him with his dad - after giving him very specific instructions of how to take care of him. We got back home and it wasn't long until the director of DFCS called to let us know that they had a problem and wanted to know if we would take the baby back, if needed. We were so hopeful! Apparently, the dad had been pulled over by the cops and when they ran his license, it came up that he was wanted in another state. The case worker had to go get the baby until everything was worked out. But - come to find out, the cops had run the wrong social and dad was OK. Our heart was broken again. But - did we survive - yes. Through the help, prayers, and kind words of friends and family, we made it through. Did we close our minds to the idea of fostering, knowing how hard to could be all over again? NO! I told John that even though we only had baby Robert for 10 days, he was loved those 10 days. He was taken to church those 10 days. He was clean, fed, and nurtured for 10 days. We made a difference in his life. Will he remember us? No. Will we remember him? Always.

It was only about 2 weeks before Cheyenne came to us in September, 2004.

Then in June, 2005 we got a call for a baby boy that was 4 months old. It was during the week of VBS at our church. Kevyn was a very sweet little boy. But he had some very serious health conditions. He had heart issues, he was born without the outside part of his left ear, and other medical issues. We kept Kevyn for almost 1 week. Cheyenne HATED IT!!! She regressed so much during this time. We were going through so much with her - court case wise - and he had such major medical conditions, we made the decision that we were not the best-fit foster parents for this little boy. He was going to have major doctor visits and more than likely operations. We had already committed to Cheyenne for almost a year at this point. It was the hardest decision that we had ever made. We had a choice to be able to keep this child. But we had to do what we felt was best for the baby. Another foster parent from another county took Kevyn in. She was at home - didn't work. She had adopted other kids through the DFCS system that had similar health issues. She was not in the least intimidated by these issues. But never the less, we survived again.

In November 2005, we meet a new addition to Scott & Lisa's house. They agreed to take in a foster child that was 4 months old. He was blonde hair, blue eye, perfect little angel. Oh, he had his issues but he was the cutest little thing ever. I will never remember seeing him for the first time at Chey's older brother's birthday party. He was 4 months old and would not look you in the eye for anything. You could actually pick him up and move him around to try to make him and he would not. He was very neglected as an infant. It turned out that Scott & Lisa found out that he was going to be a long term case. Mom & Dad was not coming to visits - they skipped town and couldn't be found - DFCS could not make contact with him. Scott & Lisa had this baby boy until he was 18 months old. That's when Israel came to live with us. It was the hardest decision that Scott & Lisa could make. I can't even imagine. As much as we wanted him to be a part of our family, it was just as hard on them to see him leave their fmily. We had ups and downs with him as well, but not nearly the battle that we had with Cheyenne. Israel had an aunt that came into the picture in July of 2006. We had talked with the social worker and were going to try to transition Israel to our house during this time. However, the social worker felt that until details were worked out concerning this aunt, it would be beneficial for Israel to stay with Scott & Lisa for stability. (It would look tons better in court.) Finally the aunt admitted that Israel's bio dad had talked her into making contact with DFCS concerning Israel. She was raising a grandchild of her own and taking care of her elderly mother. She realized that she could not handle raising a 1 year old. We had several play dates with Israel. It was very hard for him to watch Scott & Lisa leave when they would bring him to play. We kept him for a week while they went on vacation. We loved it. He adjusted to us well. Finally. . . in December, 2006, we agreed to make the transitions. DFCS was good with it and Scott & Lisa wanted us to be able to share Christmas with him. Cheyenne really took to Israel from the beginning. He wasn't such a threat for her. He could play with her and she could share things with him - teach him new things. The TPR hearing was not an issue with Israel. Parental rights were terminated due to abandonment. Israel had been in care since he was 4 months old and his parents had only visited him a total of 9 times. We adopted Israel & Cheyenne on the same day - 2-26-07.

Mel's Haven . . . . . .
If you read her blog you know that she went through a very rough time last year because of some accusation made by a biological parent. At the time, she had Maddie & Morgan. We agreed to take both children into our home for the time that they would have to be out of Melanie's home. So - we had 4 kids ages 4 and under!!!! It was like a zoo. My poor mama. . God love her. She would help me and John with the kids while trying to make sure she kept Melanie up to date on everything that was going on. I would talk to Melanie as much as possible but I remember Mama doing most of it. I was too busy with the 4 kids!!! Did it work out the best possible, check out Mel's Haven to learn that story. It's a great read!

Would we do it all again!?!?!? Absolutely. The kids are what it's all about!!!

The rest of Chey's story

Well - it's been a while. I'm determined to finish this. It's been a year since I've posted but I'm going to try to do my best. Mel's Haven is a huge inspiration to me to do this. So . . .where did I leave off? Oh yes, the Termination of Parental Rights.
Cheyenne has an older brother. Parental Rights were terminated for him. But not for Cheyenne. We were devastated. The judge didn't order her back to her biological parents. (Thank goodness becuase at this time, her biological mother was in jail! And if I rember right, so was her biological father.) We didn't know what was going to happen. There was not enough evidence in the case on Cheyenne's behalf to terminate rights. Cheyenne's biological mother told DFCS that she wanted to sign over her rights to Cheyenne. She said that she knew it would be the only way that Cheyenne and her brother would ever be able to know each other. So the case worker went to the jail where she was housed to have her sign the papers. That was it on her behalf. Once she signed, it was over with as far as she was concerned. Well. . . during this time, since rights were not terminated by the judge, we learned that the case was going to be moved to another county because the bio parents had moved. So we were going through the process of what it would be like to have even more hands involved in the case until we could file for another termination. We would have to take Cheyenne to the other county for visits that would not be as closely supervised. Her bio father had agreed to sign over rights as well. He was also in jail. When the case worker went to see him he was with the judge, therefore could not sign the papers. His lawyer was very adamant that DFCS not speak with him unless she was present with him. (He was not an educated man and could barely read.) We finally had another hearing. (I'll have to check with John to get details on this - I can't remember everything that went on.) Bio Dad was tranported to Forsyth County from jail. This is when he signed over his rights. It was so hard to believe. It was finally over. It was a nightmare that I would go through all over again. I don't remember the exact date the bio dad signed over his rights. I believe it was August. I would have to get out all of my notes and read over them. (Again, John would know this - I'll check with him.) Our adoption hearing was set for February 26, 2007. It was so hard to belive. And by this time, we felt like it was truly only a formality. Chey had been "ours" since the day she stepped foot in our home. We made the best decisions for her that we could. Just like we would have for our very own biological child.
Did I mention during any of this that we had other children come through our home? Oh, yes. we had 3 more children that we took care of. One was meant to stay forever. You'll hear his story next.
Check back on this blog becuase when I get a chance for John to read over it, I know there will be changes. My mind can't handle the retention of all the details. (That's why I have 2 binders full of information!!!) I was too concerned to care for the little princess that had been given to us by an act of God. I remember the nights that I set up and held her and rocked her. I remember the surgery on her tear duct that was clogged - carrying her in the OR room with her looking at me as if I were giving her away to someone else - having her eye stitched up after splitting it open on the coffee table. Those are the things I remember - not the court dates. But they were the worse. I want to be accurate. I want to pass along all the information I can. I don't know who out there may read this that it could be a help to. If you happen to be going through an adoption situation or are working with foster kids, you are our hero. I hope that you can read my blog and realize that things can come out for the best. God may tempt you and try you in ways that you never imagined. But always remember that He is in control and He has the master plan.